Coerced Apologies

He would get very upset when I would say true things he didn’t want to hear, or didn’t like. He would demand apologies for them. Even though I told him that I wouldn’t mean it if I said it.

He wanted me to apologize for being true to myself, for sticking up for myself, for having any kind of self-worth. His feelings were more important than the reality of our lives.

Saying I was sorry made my life livable at the time. I’m not sorry. Even though I said I was.

On this day:

In 2010 – how to avoid rape
In 2008 – I really miss having a garden
In 2007 – I used to take drumming lessons!
In 2006 – That time I realized that people actually try to make abortions illegal.
In 2005 – A comedy of errors?

 

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