The time my ex cat-napped my cat Percy (short for Percible)Posted: July 2, 2009
I’ll start this off by saying that I don’t have any cold hard proof but I’ll tell you the things I know for sure and let you decide for yourself.
The breakup with my ex was long and complicated. It took forever to be over and done with it because we broke up the last week of the month and not wanting to stay living in the same house (let alone the same room) I had to find a new place to live really fucking fast. I ended up ‘settling’ on a 200 square foot bachelor apartment downtown for which I was paying $600 per month.
It was really tiny and I had a house full of stuff (appliances furniture etc) that I cut my losses on to get out of my situation. Given that my move-in time was so short and my ex was trying to win me back, he said I could get stuff out of the house as I could find space for it etc. I decided to forget about most of the big stuff and only brought:
With all this stuff my place was totally packed but I still had lots of personal items that I wanted that I forgot about in my rush because they weren’t necessary for every day life. Lots of this included stuff that was my dad’s or were other types of family relics (the pitiful fake x-mas tree from the 70’s, old hi-8 tapes etc). So every so often the ex and I would meet up and he’d give me some of my stuff and ‘forget’ some of my other stuff so that we’d have to meet up again.
Brent and I had started dating by this point and I was putting up with the ex less and less but he was good at dangling things I wanted back in front of me. Sometime in August he was over at my place. I forget why exactly. He wanted a cigarette so we went out on my ‘balcony’. My balcony was big enough for 2 people to stand on and that’s it. It was between my window and the fire escape so basically you could climb up the fire escape to my balcony. He noticed that my screen was a little popped out and I explained that Percy had seen one of my neighbour’s cats and smashed into the screen popping it out a little. At that point I just pushed it back from the outside and he said
"You should get Brent to put a nail in that or else you’ll lose Percy down the fire escape."
I wasn’t too worried about it since I saw her hit it full force and it didn’t come out enough for her to fit out.
Maybe one week later, Brent was spending the night and the next morning the screen was popped out a lot and Percy was nowhere to be found (really the place was miniscule, I didn’t even have to look for her for more than 30 seconds). I went out on my balcony and looked down and didn’t see her (I was only 1 floor up so she wouldn’t have died from jumping but still…) My neighbour ‘the cat lady’ was out on her balcony and I asked her if she saw Percy and described her. The lady looked very worried and said she hadn’t seen her but if she did she would take her in and let me know. She took care of the strays in the area in addition to her own cats.
I put up flyers and started to go to the humane society twice a week to look for her.
I saw the ex maybe a week after that and he asked me how Percy was so I had to tell him the story. Then HE started going to the humane society too which was annoying to me as it was completely un-necessary.
Brent and I were moving in together the first week of September and I was worrying that I wouldn’t find her before then. We had a trip to Halifax planned for right after our move as well. The time came and no sign of her. I was sad and the whole trip was talking to Brent about how I wanted to get a new kitten when we got back but on the other hand how it wouldn’t be the same as having Percy.
The trip was a week long and by the time we got back Percy had been missing one month.
There was a message on my answering machine (we kept the same number as at my apartment to save fees) from the ex about how he found Percy at the humane society while we were on vacation. Oh what fortune! I mean, if he wasn’t going there she would just have been adopted out to someone else right? Well, I did register with them to get a call if any cat matching her description arrived, I never got a call but I digress… We made arrangements for me to pick her up and he made all kinds of stipulations and basically held her hostage for a couple of days until he realized I wasn’t playing his stupid game.
Brent drove me to the ex’s and waited in the car while I went in to get her. The ex led me up to his (our old) room and had to move the bed to get her out from under it. She was SO SKINNY, like she hadn’t eaten the entire time and she looked totally terrified and miserable even though it was the same place and same people she had lived with for the past few years.
He told me that when he found her at the humane society, they gave him the full contact information of the person who brought her in and it turned out it was the cat lady. He said he went to thank her and that she told him that she had seen Brent open the balcony door early in the morning and throw Percy out of it. I asked him to explain why she didn’t say that to me when I first spoke to her and he could not.
Also, my apartment was literally one room and the bed was on stilts so there’s no fucking way Brent could have done that without me noticing, not to mention that he WOULDN’T do that.
Anyways that’s my story now you tell me, did he cat-nap her?
On this day:
In 2008 –
In 2007 –
In 2006 –
In 2005 – The Grudge is a fucking scary movie