I have a serious problem…

and it’s that I always want to eat everything. Even things I don’t eat.

I was reminiscing about ‘chicken fried bacon’ which has to be the most unhealthiest meal I’ve ever concocted but damn it it tastes SO GOOD.  The problem with that though, is that I couldn’t fathom touching the raw meat or actually chewing it so I obviously can’t eat it, but I WANT to.

I also want to eat hot dogs because it’s spring and I love Maple Leaf BBQ size hot dogs grilled with diagonal strips and served with mustard, corn relish, sautéed and green olives, but again, I don’t think I could bring myself to actually chew it.  I’ve tries Yves Veggie Dogs but they just taste like play dough to me.  I mean, hot dogs are barely meat so why is it impossible to make a vegetarian substitute with a similar texture/flavour????

Aside from the meats whose tastes I would enjoy, if someone mentions any kind of food at all, I really really want it.  Like… a lot.  Luckily gas prices are so high that I am not compelled to go to the grocery store.  But I did eat a square of baker’s chocolate after Brent said the words ‘Kit Kat’.

If I was let loose on all the foods I dream up in a day, I would definitely gain about 5 pounds a day, which is crazy!  It’s like I have stoner munchies ALL THE TIME!  Like right now I’m thinking of eating a KFC Big Crunch with a side of gravy! Absurd since i KNOW it’s super gross!

I’m also thinking of healthy foods but that’s not as shocking.  I want to purée all my mangoes and pineapple and make popsicles but I don’t have any molds and 1″ ice cubes won’t cut it.

Some spaghetti would also be good right about now. Or coleslaw! Not the creamy kind though, I think that’s super gross.

I could go on and on so I’m forcing myself to end this post right now.

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16 Comments on “I have a serious problem…”

  1. rachaeldoss says:

    Sadly, this sounds like me everytime I watch food network. And, sadlier, I eat almost anything, so I don’t even have normal grossout factor to stop me from shoving hotdogs or KFC in my face.

  2. rachaeldoss says:

    Sadly, this sounds like me everytime I watch food network. And, sadlier, I eat almost anything, so I don’t even have normal grossout factor to stop me from shoving hotdogs or KFC in my face.

  3. Bless your heart.
    I don’t know *why* pregnancy makes women crave such bizarre stuff… you think nature would take over and make us crave fresh fruit, raw veggies and soy milk to ensure the growing child’s health… but Nooooo…… we want JUNK. Any junk. All junk. And LOTS of it.
    I haven’t had any truly bizarre cravings. (I think the baker’s chocolate, kit kat story is hilarious by the way) I mainly want pancakes and ice cream. Not together. Just in large quantities.
    At least we are nearing the end…

    • tianadargent says:

      I want fresh fruit until about 11 am, then I want carbs then when I get home, I want french fries (which I make from scratch in the oven to avoid the deep fried fattiness then I want junk until I go to bed.
      I want slushies at ALL times.

    • tianadargent says:

      I want fresh fruit until about 11 am, then I want carbs then when I get home, I want french fries (which I make from scratch in the oven to avoid the deep fried fattiness then I want junk until I go to bed.
      I want slushies at ALL times.

  4. Bless your heart.
    I don’t know *why* pregnancy makes women crave such bizarre stuff… you think nature would take over and make us crave fresh fruit, raw veggies and soy milk to ensure the growing child’s health… but Nooooo…… we want JUNK. Any junk. All junk. And LOTS of it.
    I haven’t had any truly bizarre cravings. (I think the baker’s chocolate, kit kat story is hilarious by the way) I mainly want pancakes and ice cream. Not together. Just in large quantities.
    At least we are nearing the end…

  5. slushie
    i was in Blockbuster and i saw the giant poster of Juno drinking a slushie and suddenly i HAD to have one at all costs.
    I dragged my roommate through the city for BLOCKS looking for one until she just started getting grumbly so i had to settle for a wendy’s frosty which
    sucked
    and i never drank. 😡
    if only i’d known they’d had floats i’d have gotten that instead.

  6. slushie
    i was in Blockbuster and i saw the giant poster of Juno drinking a slushie and suddenly i HAD to have one at all costs.
    I dragged my roommate through the city for BLOCKS looking for one until she just started getting grumbly so i had to settle for a wendy’s frosty which
    sucked
    and i never drank. 😡
    if only i’d known they’d had floats i’d have gotten that instead.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Fry the Yves Veggie Dogs in a little marg (or butter if you like), so they get a little brown and crispy on the outside — they taste, much, much better that way (XUP)

  8. Anonymous says:

    Fry the Yves Veggie Dogs in a little marg (or butter if you like), so they get a little brown and crispy on the outside — they taste, much, much better that way (XUP)


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